Today’s newsletter is brought to you by Life Kit digital editor Malaka Gharib
When I got married 10 years ago, my husband and I went all out. Our theme was “Hollywood glam.” I wore a wedding dress that made me look like a 100-tiered cake. We held the reception at a grand ballroom in a historic building in downtown Los Angeles.
So imagine my horror when one of my guests (a plus-one, at that) showed up to my elegant wedding wearing … SHORTS! 😱
I know I’m being petty, but that’s the thing about weddings. They bring out the strangest sides in people. So I felt vindicated reading some of the reader questions in this latest round of wedding etiquette-themed questions for Dear Life Kit. At least I didn’t do that, I thought to myself while listening. 😇
Photo illustration by Becky Harlan/Getty Images/NPR
I also learned some fascinating new insights about modern wedding etiquette. Some of the rules that I grew up on seem to have changed!
💸 How much should you spend on wedding presents? Some people think you should give a gift equal to what the couple spent on you, but etiquette coach Myka Meier has different thoughts.
🎉 How much control should your parents have over your wedding? Traditionally, the bride and groom’s families footed a chunk of the wedding costs and had a bigger hand in wedding planning, says Meier. But these days, couples often prefer to pay for weddings themselves, if they can. Find out how Meier says that changes the power dynamics.
📅 How to deal with two weddings on the same day. Meier says you can go to both, but if you have to pick one, make sure you know how to politely RSVP no.
Unfortunately, none of our experts asked anything about shorts, but you know where I stand on that issue! 🚫🩳
The dos and don'ts of being a plus-one. Free dinner, free cake, a dance floor – being a plus-one has its benefits. But it can also come with pressure. Here's the plus-one etiquette you need to be a winning guest in any party environment. Read the comic here.
Prenups aren't just for the rich and famous. They're for everyone. They can address whether you and your spouse will have a joint bank account, whether you'll pay off your student loans separately or together, and who gets what if you divorce. Read the story here.
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